Since she passed away, I’ve often looked each day to see what Mitzi and I were doing on this day during the 3 years I was her sidekick (or she was mine). It’s rare that there was a picture on the same date during all 3 years. But yesterday there was. It was fascinating for me to look at all 3 pictures and remember the details of how she was on those 3 days, one year between each.In the first one, I was still trying to adjust to what we would do to stay entertained during our days together. On this particular day, I had to get some items from the warehouse club that was not too far from her house. I hadn’t learned yet that taking her shopping could be tricky because she would constantly wonder or worry that she needed to buy something that was “on the list at home.” She’d pick up random things that I knew weren’t probably a need like a package of socks or light bulbs or a laundry basket. I quickly learned that if we were going shopping, I better not need to do it in a hurry! I also learned that, similar to the way it had been when my boys were young, if their hands were occupied, they would get into less. While we were shopping and she kept picking up random things I knew weren’t really needed at home, I spotted this giant bear. I told her it was a hugging bear and it gave out free hugs. Although the disease wasn’t yet such that she couldn’t recognize that I was kidding (she laughed and thought it was a great concept), she did, however, seem perfectly contented to walk up and down the aisles with me as she hugged the bear. She was still handling all of her activities of daily living (ADLs) back then, so she was wearing two shirts and probably didn’t realize that it was slightly odd to do so. I never said anything. Once, though, she told me she was grateful that I never got upset with her when she’d put her clothes on wrong. I’d just gently help her fix it if she seemed like she was OK with the help, and if not, we’d just go out with 2 shirts! No harm done!The following year on that date, we were with her sister and Mitzi was still able to be up later in the evenings on occasion and enjoyed socializing tremendously. She was so very grateful for all of the extra time her sister spent with her throughout the last years of this disease. Though by this time, I was helping her with dressing and was cueing or assisting with many of her other ADLs, but we still had so many fun evenings like this one where Mitzi got lots of hugs from her “seester,” as she referred to her. In 2019, Mitzi was in the midst of one of the most challenging phases of the disease, where she was fraught with anxiety and sometimes, downright despair. For everyone, especially for Gary and me who were with her the most, it was an emotional roller coaster, taxing, sometimes scary, and altogether heartbreaking to see her like that. On this particular day last year, I had tried taking Mitzi on a Hug Parade to help quiet her anxious heart, but even the usual drive-by huggings did little to calm the storm raging through her mind. But all that changed when we “just so happened” (wink, wink!), to run into her BFF since high school while we were walking around at the beach. Seeing Sandra and giving her a long, teary hug was a magic reset for Mitzi for at least a little while.It was so fascinating to look at these 3 snapshot moments in time in the life of Mitzi’s Early-Onset Alzheimer’s Disease. In 2019, on this same day as these other 3 photos, I took a picture of a quote I saw in a book that spoke so perfectly of the way Mitzi’s life impacted those around her and, in turn, the way those lives connected her to us and we impacted her…just as it says, “…we get a glimpse of a larger plan…one that enables us to feel connected…one that shows us that love blesses the giver and the receiver…”????
